4 1/2 Months Out-Phynley

Where are we 4 1/2 months post adoption with Phynley?

Here are just a couple of observations:

We are well on our way through the attachment process.  Phynley has done a great job attaching to our family.  She really enjoys playing with her sisters and hanging out with them, when they let her. She mimics lots of what they do and wants to be a big kid too.  She seems to be doing well with her attachment to both mom and dad too which is fantastic!  Sometimes we joke with friends that she is overly attached to mom, but in all honesty it's a good thing and I am so glad that we are seeing such secure bonds.  The attachment process was different with Ellie so I am thankful for the progress that Phynley has made.

This is probably one of my fave Phynley pics :)

We have started down the long road of surgeries.  Phynley had her first cleft related surgery on August 15th.  She had her palate repaired.  She did great with the surgery and was released from the hospital with just one overnight stay!  Yay for mom since I got very little sleep while in the hospital!  She has adjusted nicely and her surgeon says her repair looks great!  They were not able to close all the holes unfortunately because her palate was so expansive.  She still has two holes at the very front of her mouth and occasionally liquid still goes through her nose.  Those two holes will have to wait to be closed until she has her bone grafts done and that won't be till she's 8-9.  So for now we just clean her up after she's messy.  I am sure that soon it will be a process of helping her be more aware of this and be able to make a few adjustments as she eats to not have this happen, especially when she starts school.  Her next surgery is scheduled for early December.  Her plastic surgeon will be doing a repair of her nose and lip.  This is an elective surgery and one that I was torn over.  However, her plastic surgeon thinks he can get her lip repair, which was done very well in China, to look even smaller and more natural.  He also can give more definition to her nose.  We have decided to go ahead with the surgery.  We think she's absolutely beautiful the way she is, however I also recognize that this is the time to do the repair if we are going to do it.  We want to do as much as we can to make her scars as unnoticeable as possible to help her as she navigates elementary, middle and high school.  So we feel this surgery is one that we should have done.  But it means yet another 1-2 nights in the hospital.  

We have started down the long road of therapy.  Phynley currently receives developmental therapy and speech therapy through our Early Intervention program.  Developmental therapy is kind of an all encompassing therapy that includes a little bit of everything.  Ellie got both from early intervention when we brought her home as well, but in addition Ellie had OT and PT.  Phynley does not receive OT and PT.  Thankfully, she has no need currently for either of those services.  Phynley's acquisition of understanding the English language is going very well.  Her ability to communicate the English language to us...well let's just say that it's a slow process.  We can discern Mama, more and all done (not because all done actually sounds like all done-it really comes out more like ama until you slow her down and make her say all).   Most other sounds are just babble to me.  No D, P, T or B.  IF she attempts any of those sounds it all comes out sounding like an M.  She's got M covered.  That may be the only sound she has covered.  She goes for a speech eval with the cleft therapist in Nov.  That's the earliest we could get her in for some help on how to move forward with her speech.  Her early intervention therapist is very good but we wanted to get some more help.  We may continue with both or just use what we learn to help our current therapist move her forward.

Phynley is strong-willed.  Stubborn.  I am drawing a blank on another synonym.  She wants mommy ALL the time it seems.  And while I love it and love her to pieces, there are times when I am just simply trying to make it through the next few minutes.  She's a great sleeper both through the night and at nap time and for that I am really thankful!  I am able to have time to try to get some stuff done around the house while she naps a few days a week.  And we have lots of fun playing together when we have the time, but it is usually on her terms.  She often is completely uncooperative for speech therapy.  She doesn't like being "made" to do something and often will just refuse to cooperate.  We are learning to navigate her personality and use it to best help her reach her potential, but wow it can be tiring at times.

We are TIRED.  While we love each of the girls so so much, I can't imagine doing life with any more than four.  I am exhausted most of the time.  I feel like the house is constantly in a state of chaos when all the kids are home and how does adding just one kiddo seem to add so much more craziness?!!  Both Jeff and I drop into bed each night exhausted and the nights that we are both home catching up on one of our favorite shows, I am usually asleep on the floor.  I don't think we ever anticipated being quite so exhausted and life being quite so crazy.  We would do it all over in a heartbeat but we are still adjusting to life with four to say the least!  Thankfully God loves us, is patient with us and gives us what we need to make it through each day.  

That's life with Phynley in a quick summary.  While I don't take a lot of pictures I have captured a few more...

 I love the tub!  It is so much fun to splash and get everyone wet!

 I also love my crib...and sleep...after I stop crying about going to sleep, that is...

 I want to go to school and be a Goshen Gator just like my sister Ellie..

 Really...I do...

 mom..did you have to make me look so ridiculous??!!

love me some goggles...they are pretty cool...